Would you marry a non-Lebanese?

[Salome]

Originally Posted by Hye4Lebanon

Of course living abroad you are exposed to other cultures. However, there are many Lebanese men who chose to come to Lebanon to pick a wife - at least that is what I was told.

Yeah, its up to preferences, I know a case like that too...umm he is not the nicest guy I know, but I dont want to draw any general conclusions

[shadow1]

Originally Posted by Red Phoenix

nice

but what the heck does it mean ?

;)

زوان بلادنا ولا قمح الصليبي
In vulgar English it means our country's Sh* is better than a foreigner's cake
long time ago people used to buy wheat and grind it to make flour then bread out of . Amongst the wheat there were usually some seeds which are from parasite plants and are useless. These are called زوان so the literary meaning of this proverb is we prefer the زوان of our country to the قمح of the Salibi ( as in Byzantine). i. e. stranger.
As parochial as we are and in the context of this thread, a dowdy dull girl from my community is better for me than a sophisticated creature from elsewhere. That is what my mother told my sister when a Roum dude wanted to marry her.

You are not good at commoners literature, are you RP?

[Salome]

Originally Posted by shadow1

زوان بلادنا ولا قمح الصليبي
In vulgar English it means our country's Sh* is better than a foreigner's cake
long time ago people used to buy wheat and grind it to make flour then bread out of . Amongst the wheat there were usually some seeds which are from parasite plants and are useless. These are called زوان so the literary meaning of this proverb is we prefer the زوان of our country to the قمح of the Salibi ( as in Byzantine). i. e. stranger.
As parochial as we are and in the context of this thread, a dowdy dull girl from my community is better for me than a sophisticated creature from elsewhere.

You are not good at commoners literature are you RP?

Dont believe you

Cant imagine you with the dull girl, better alone with Gone with the wind:D

[Red Phoenix]

Originally Posted by shadow1

زوان بلادنا ولا قمح الصليبي
In vulgar English it means our country's Sh* is better than a foreigner's cake
long time ago people used to buy wheat and grind it to make flour then bread out of . Amongst the wheat there were usually some seeds which are from parasite plants and are useless. These are called زوان so the literary meaning of this proverb is we prefer the زوان of our country to the قمح of the Salibi ( as in Byzantine). i. e. stranger.
As parochial as we are and in the context of this thread, a dowdy dull girl from my community is better for me than a sophisticated creature from elsewhere. That is what my mother told my sister when a Roum dude wanted to marry her.

You are not good at commoners literature, are you RP?

that was very enlightning i must say, and educational too ! thx

but i'm afraid u got it right, when it comes to made-in-lebanon pointless proverbs u will always find me at a disadvantage here ;)

anyhows, coming back to the topic of chasitity belts at hand

i would have to say that u do present a subtle argument here that i can understand a bit, for after all who doesnt prefer to deal with the devil he already knows instead of the devil he doesn't know all that well yet ? :)

[Salome]

Originally Posted by Red Phoenix

i would have to say that u do present a subtle argument here that i can understand a bit, for after all who doesnt prefer to deal with the devil he already knows instead of the devil he doesn't know all that well yet ? :)

I find it too mediocre to stick to ones own tribe by all means...and we have examples of that quite a lot...but maybe for me it is easier to think that way since am quite detached of any identities

[Faithful]

Originally Posted by Salome

hmm about divorce abroad, you see that happenning often because there it is easy to divorce...would this be the case in Lebanon, you would see the same divorce rate or even higher....have to say rare are those marriages which would last had they have the chance nevertheless to divorce (I know to your face everybody tells they are perfectly happy, but you dont need to believe everything what they say)

I agree on that maybe if divorce is easy in Lebanon, we can see more divorced people, but still many lebanese man and woman will feel safe if they got married with a lebanese woman/man ....and especially men ...
Why ???? maybe because law in lebanon doesnt give the women a lot of rights like in other countries so they always feel dominant..... or maybe they think that lebanese women will take care of them better because they understand their way of thinking better and she can support their madness , or because in our culture taking care of our family is always our first choice .. woman usually think about their children and husband before thinking about their own life

Originally Posted by Salome

Okay, dont know if you agree with me, in Lebanon probably there is a small chance to meet foreigners from various background, with whom you can build a common future with, and not just passing friendships...so I really wonder my question is relevant only for those who live outside Lebanon?

Yes in Lebanon there is a small chance to meet foreigners from various background, but they still exist .... Add many young men/women travel a lot and meet a lot of new people with different culture.... and i know a lot of them who get married and are happy ... and some are not happy at all and get divorced.

[shadow1]

Originally Posted by Salome

I find it too mediocre to stick to ones own tribe by all means...and we have examples of that quite a lot...but maybe for me it is easier to think that way since am quite detached of any identities

Like all situations it has its advantages as well as its disadvantages. I agree in the sense that this may lead to mental stagnation and at times intellectual impovrishment and ugly kids but as Faithful stated quite eloquently above there is something to say to being of the same background. The bond is generally stronger and the shared common interests can deepen the relationship.
Judging by my friends who married foreigners, the obvious observation is the divorce rate is much higher but with Lebanese spouses there is always the community to fall back on when marriage inevitably becomes no more than a form of familiar co-habitation.
An again there is no general rule that fits all. My cousins married westerners and somehow they still managed to produce ugly kids.

[Red Phoenix]

Originally Posted by Salome

I find it too mediocre to stick to ones own tribe by all means...and we have examples of that quite a lot...but maybe for me it is easier to think that way since am quite detached of any identities

luckily i agree

sadly u missed the joke which is forgivable

and finally i will take ur word for ur declared 'detachement' :)

[Salome]

Originally Posted by Faithful

..... or maybe they think that lebanese women will take care of them better because they understand their way of thinking better and she can support their madness ,

hmm dont agree here, nationality wont be a guarantee for taking care nicely of their men, I can give you so many examples

or because in our culture taking care of our family is always our first choice .. woman usually think about their children and husband before thinking about their own life

Yes thats true for most Lebanese women family comes first, has to do with traditions....

Originally Posted by shadow1

Like all situations it has its advantages as well as its disadvantages. I agree in the sense that this may lead to mental stagnation and at times intellectual impovrishment and ugly kids but as Faithful stated quite eloquently above there is something to say to being of the same background. The bond is generally stronger and the shared common interests can deepen the relationship.
Judging by my friends who married foreigners, the obvious observation is the divorce rate is much higher but with Lebanese spouses there is always the community to fall back on when marriage inevitably becomes no more than a form of familiar co-habitation.
An again there is no general rule that fits all. My cousins married westerners and somehow they still managed to produce ugly kids.

You can be very right in general as well, not just talking about Lebanese...which makes me officialy declared out-of-all tribes alien..but you know I dont mind it

[Faithful]

Originally Posted by Salome

hmm dont agree here, nationality wont be a guarantee for taking care nicely of their men, I can give you so many examples

It's not about nationality, it's about traditions, culture and education.
It's about understanding how lebanese men think and accept to share them their needs. I know that some foreign girls are able to do it, but unfortunately the majority of the lebanese men are hard to understand and hard to satisfy.... this is how they were raised.
I think Lebanese Girls know how to deal with them better than foreigner ones .... just because they were raised together in the same environment, they got the same education.... they are more patient with them

I repeat, it really depends on the person... if the man has typical lebanese mentality, i swear to God none of any foreigners girl can handle him lol ... ma bye7emlou