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3 Weeks Ago
Driving tips for Lebanon:
When you are driving your car in Lebanon, you should think of all the other cars around you as ennemies.
Don't use any flashers or light signals, because in this you will be showing what are your intentions to the ennemy, and if it is really necessary, light your right blinker when you wanna turn to the left and vice versa showing the other motherf*ckers who is the king of the road!!!
The pedestrians are an inhibiting force just meant to stand in your way, try to teach them to stay at their homes instead by driving very dangerously towards them and pretending not to see them, but be careful not to roll over any of them unless you can afford paying his "jniyto".
If you are driving an old car, follow the only rule that everyone must get out of your way.
If you are driving a new car which you bought from the sweat on your forehead, then follow the rule to get out of the way of the other rotten cars.
Never look to your right side when turning left, because if you do, you will show the other cars coming from your right side that you are attentive to their presence, resulting in you having to slow down or stop to let them pass before you, which lead you of course, to loose a point for the benefit of your ennemies.
In heavy traffic jams and roundabouts, you should follow one rule and one rule only: The one who succeeds to get BOUZ SIYARTO first in the little hole, gets to pass first, you may have a very usefull weapon to help you which is your ZAMMOUR! Shove your BOUZ SIYARTAK first in combination with honking your ZAMMOUR should get you to beat your ennemies all the time, but refrain from using this tactic with the busses and the trucks just for the sake of BOUZ SIYARTAK!
When driving on the road, try not to leave any space between you and the car in front of you, because leaving such a space in between even if it was tiny, means that another BOUZ SIYARA will penetrate in front of you and this will be of course on the expense of your honour and your reputation.
While driving on the road, try to keep the middle white line on the streets always well positioned to the center of your car, doing this, you will send a message to the other ennemy cars behind you that you are a hardneck if they are thinking to overtake you and you won't give in easily. Positioning the middle white line on the streets well to the center of your car will allow you also to change lanes whenever you need to in a blink of a second and without having to use any light or manual signals.
While driving on the highway, try to stick in the rear of the car rolling in front of you, and when the driver sees you, there are 3 scenarios that might happen:
- If the driver in front of you is well behaved, he will directly move away so that you can overtake him, by doing this you should give him a downgrading and mocking look, you just won over that coward.
- If the driver in front of you is a little well behaved, he will let you overtake him, but while doing this, you will hear from him a lot of words, which contains a lot of animals and sisters and mothers and other family members.
- If the driver in front of you is absolutely not well behaved (which most of them are), he will start to slow down and handle his car in a way to make you hit a wall or a tree while you will be hearing from him the same words with a lot of animals and mothers and sisters and other family members. Here you should never be wearing your seatbelt because it may slow you down to get out of the car and beat the **** out of him.
Following those rules will just get you through the Lebanese roads so please do follow them!!! | 
