Old and New Jokes!!!

[Superman]

Yalla post some unknown, u too make us laugh.

[METALLICA]

A rapist was on the run in Syria for some months now.. so the Moukhabarat were called to catch him.. after a few weeks, they were finally able to know where he lives. the captain calls his men: "Shoufou wlaa, 3refna ween beeto la had, biddi yakon iddam beeto ba3d sa3a wla, fahmin ?"
- "Fahmin sidna"
they go to the suspect's building, but they just realize they don't know how he looks like.. so they put their minds together to think of something, and they find a great idea.
Meanwhile, the captain is waiting, 1 hour, 2 hours, 3, 4, 5, ... 9 hours go by and the soldiers are not back yet.. so he goes to check on them.
He gets there and sees all of his men bent over with their pants around their ankles.
- Wla shou 3amlin enta w yah ?!
- Kameen sidna !
:D

[METALLICA]

A Syrian officer sends his men to steal a car from Lebanon, they get the car, but near the border, they go full speed into a brick wall. none dead or injured, but the car was squeezed into a tiny box. They call the officer to come help them.
Once the officer is there, he looks and sees his men taking turns blowing into the exhaust.
- shou 3am ta3mlou enta w yah wla ?!
- 3am nonfokh el siyyara sidna, meshan terja3 metl ma kanet.
- Wla Hmar, bisakkro el shebbak bel awwal !

[Abou Ali]

Bashar Assad teaching his children the spelling of ASSASSINATION:
An '***' behind another '***' and behind that ' I 'and behind the two assess and I , a whole 'Nation'

[METALLICA]

After Syrian withdrawal from Lebanon, Lebanese organized a surprise attack on Syria, Hezballa went first and started attacking the border.
Syrians called on their "Maghawir" from Homos.

the maghawir deployed and aimed all their guns and cannons 90 degrees up in the air, basically shooting straight above themselves in the sky while everything they shot fell back on them.

"Shou 3am ta3mlo ya hamir !?" asked the captain.
- "3am nodrob 3al kiyadi sidna."

[ARMENO]

Originally Posted by layyouss

Bashar Assad teaching his children the spelling of ASSASSINATION:
An '***' behind another '***' and behind that ' I 'and behind the two assess and I , a whole 'Nation'

ouch

[-unknown-]

a little child go to school for regitration (he's 4 years old)! so the "directrice" told him to sing a song, so the boy sing:
7orriye, siyeide, 2este2leil!!!


i have another haifa and bachar el assad, but i don;t think X will let me post it!!!

[Souss]

It was decided to conduct a competition between the CIA, the KGB and the Syrian moukhabarat. What they did is that they sent out a gazelle ("ghazal" the female of the deer) in the woods, and the goal is to catch it in the shortest time.

So the CIA go first. They send out the gazelle in the woods, wait a few minutes, and then the CIA operatives run through the woods to catch it. 5 minutes later they come back with the gazelle.

Then comes the KGB's turn. in less than 3 minutes they come back with the gazelle. Everybody is impressed.

Now comes the Syrian moukhabarat's turn. They go after the gazelle. 3 min, 5 min, 15 min, 1h, 3h pass and they are still not back.

The other guys go to look for them in the woods, only to find them gathered around a donkey and beating him up and shouting "3teref woulaaa ennak ghazaaal!"

[TonyFPM]

What does A homsi best find in Hayfa?










Her voice lololol

[Abou Ali]

Originally Posted by TonyFPM

What does A homsi best find in Hayfa?


Her voice lololol

L L tonyfpm nice one