Old and New Jokes!!!

[Superman]

Tony fout nem bala kamekha ba2a.

[Outlife]

A Frenchman, an Italian and a Homsi walk into a motel and ask for a room. The owner says "Alright, but my beautifful daughter is sleeping upstairs. If any of you even go look at her sleeping I'll kill you all!" The three travellers agreed and got the room with the staircase leading up to the beautifful daughter. Of course, they were to curious and decided to each take a quick look and get back to their beds before the owner caught them. First the Frenchman went up the staircase. But when he was almost to the top, the stair creaked loudly and the owner shouted "Who made that noise!? I'll kill you!" So the Frenchman answered "Meow!" And the owner thought it was just his little cat. When he got dowstairs he told the Italian of the owner's daughter's beauty and warned him about the creaky stair. So the Italian did the same as the Frenchman and pretended to be a little cat when the stair creaked. Last it was the Homsi's turn. So the Italian tells him "When the owner shouts, just pretend it's the cat, and we will not all be killed." So the Homsi goes up the stairs and sure enough the last step creaks loudly. The owner shouts "Who made that noise!? I'll kill you!" The Homsi confidently answers "The cat!".

[Outlife]

A defence minister was coming to visit Syria once and our defence Minister was telling our honour guard soldier to fire 21 shots once the guest appears from the plane, a Homsi soldier asked him, "Sir what if I hit him from the first shot shall we continue shooting".

[-unknown-]

HEHEHEHE!!!!!!!

leik i won't say everytime that they're nice;)!!!
la2anno iza heik ma ra7 nokhlass!!
keep posting!!

[Caron]

Soury terek Lebnen, ra7 beddou ysarref masriyetou, men Lebneni la-Soury.
Byesaal el-sarraf: "Shenno shou byeswa el-Soury bhaliyaaaam??"
Biqelllou el-sarraf: "byeswa AY..toooooooooooot !"

[Caron]

Leyh el-nemer bi-homs byelhaq el-siyara??
Lianno fi 3laya nemra!

Fhemt el-nekteh?!?

[Outlife]

A Homsi and a Lebanese were walking outside when the Lebanese said, "Oh, look at the dead bird." The Homsi looked towards the sky and said "Where, where?"

[Outlife]

there was two sirilakian girl on a moto
the first "2abeto" and the second " masa7et ta7to"

[cedarheart]

A syrian had to go to Paris for some business. He was worried how he's gonna do things since he doesn't speak any french. His friend says to him: "Wala y hemmak, El Faransi hayyine, byekfi ennak t7ot Le aw La abel kill kelmeh" (don't worry, french is easy all what you have to do is to put "le" or "la" before each word)

After his arrival to his hotel in paris, the syrian went down to the restaurant to have lunch, he calls the waiter:
"Chlonak? Jibli Le khebez, la dajaj.."
The waiter gets him what he wanted, the syrian felt so proud of himself, he was pseaking fluent french he thought!!! he called again the waiter:
"Akhiiii! Le kebbayit La may"
the waiter gets him a glass of water, felling so happy the syrian kept on ordering things:
"La riz, le chorba, la zebdeh....."

At the end he asked: "Akhi? La fatoura?"
when the waiter brings him the bill the syrian says:"Lak Le farancy mitl la arabi, ma3 le le wou la la!"
The waiter replies: "Wle!!! chkor le rabbak enno le mahsoubak lebnani, wa2ella kenet akalet la ......."

[Caron]

Originally Posted by cedarheart

The waiter replies: "Wle!!! chkor le rabbak enno le mahsoubak lebnani, wa2ella kenet akalet la ......."

After that the Homsi gets along with the Lebanese waiter -el-ghorbeh btejma3- and he asks him how he can... you know... date a cute frensh girl. Since he lebanese guy was there for long time, he fixed him up with a cute frensh lady that he fell in Love with, and he wanted to talk with her and confess his Love! So he went and bought a book about love and how to speek the tender words of love in Frensh!
He studied the book, and on the great night, he goes to the restaurant... In this time the girl fell in love with him and on the dinner "à la chandelle" she tells him: "Jamil, moi je t'aime!!" his heart beating fast... He put himself together and answered her: "Et moi aussi murmura-t-il!!"