Lebanese friendship?

[Kakou]

Originally Posted by Superman

True kakou that friendship is so precious and that "A friend in need is a friend indeed" but u have many Lebanese people who are somehow related to the "FRIENDS" u referred too. In other words, they could call ur parents Mr. and Mrs. and never ask for food and be there for a while... There's many of those especially especially especially in Lebanon.
There's many people that could trick u and play nice with u and act as if there are friends, but then they go stab u in the back. If u didn't met any of those in ur life yet, I hope u don't meet them at all... Cause I can tell u that I've had my little experience in this and I can tell u it hurts like hell :)

And I have to agree with Freak, the exact word should be true friends!

I knew and experimented and still that kind of people, but I don't call them friends anymore!!
Concerning my point in the thread, it's not that I don't beleive in foreign friendships!! No!! It's just the way that Lebanese people act when they really love someone!! Do you tell me that ALL of the FRIENDS from all around the world do the same????????????/!! It will be the weirdest thing I've eve heard!!


Freak
Same answer to that quote:

You should have more friends in other countries, perhaps live there for a while

[Faithful]

Kakou, Yes True friendship is very hard to find nowadays. Akid there are good friends every where in the world and not only in Lebanon, but the lebanese people bi tabi3itoun are very friendly and very helpful . I agree with WiseCookie it's about our culture that differs from other people. It's the way we've been raised that makes us different.

So i still believe that Lebanese people have something very special in their way of life. I always feel that we don't have strangers in Lebanon ya3ni we welcome all the people and we treat them like family and as we know them from a long time ago. And this does not exist in all other countries. For this i think the lebanese friend is special.
And please don't misunderstand me i am not saying he is better than other people and that all lebanese people are good , no i am just saying we are different and i like that.

And the most i liked and i feel that the majority of the lebanese do :

Originally Posted by Kakou

FRIENDS: Will eat at your dinner table and leave.
LEBANESE FRIENDS: Will spend hours there, talking, laughing and just being together.

FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
LEBANESE FRIENDS: Always bring the food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.
LEBANESE FRIENDS: Call your parents Uncle/Dad and Aunt / Mum.

[lewis]

i will tell u one thing... friends come and go even true ones

[Kakou]

Originally Posted by lewis

i will tell u one thing... friends come and go even true ones

Yes, we know!! It's not a rule BTW!
But what do you think about the Lebanese way to be a friend??

[freak]

Originally Posted by Kakou

Yes, we know!! It's not a rule BTW!
But what do you think about the Lebanese way to be a friend??

Nothing . Sure it is better than in some western countries especially, but all what was written is not uncommon amongst an Asian-African friendship.

You can be a terrible friend , does that conclude you are not Lebanese?

My friend who in UK who is not Lebanese,Arab,English falls among that category..
----

[tamerlane]

i think that friendship is like any relation, you get impressed by a person and you engage in friendship . you idealize him till the time for any reason you notice something unpleasant in his relation, as let's say a weakness or he fails to help, or whatsoever . and furthermore the relation loses of it's strenght.you see it 's a lot of psychology no one can be a friendly "ghost". what is going wrong is that we look always to high standards.but here in lebanon there is no boundaries in a relationship , what makes it after a while unbearable .finally those you love and you hate are from you direct surrouding

[Claudia]

Originally Posted by coralie

thats the TRUE friendship wich is based on no other then honesty integrity love understanding tolerence and caring . be there with you for you in good as well as in bad times ....
but ...and there is always a BUT ... like superman said i think that many of us had their own bad experiences with "fake" friends (i know i did )

Sadly this is true too. I once had a Lebanese friend who was all candies and flowers. Always praising, always spending hours at my table, and like Coralie said and

and yet at the first occasion and for some "personal interests" they simply : ignore you , backstab you , vanish , they dont even call once a year to ask about you and when they occasionaly see you somewhere byebermo wejjon as if they did nt see you ....it happen ...a lot ...believe me~!!!!!!!

. This is very true!

Anyway with me this only happened once (with a Lebanese). But my cousins in USA say this happen there all the time. So, I guess the probability about finding a good friend in Lebanon is pretty high!

[Kakou]

You are still talking about true or bad friends! My point was: IF YOU HAVE A TRUE LEBANESE FRIEND, THIS IS HOW HE ACTS!!... GOT IT !!

Thank you anyway for all of what you've written! It was a pleasure reading your posts and your experiences!! I'm the MOST hurted person by FRIENDS!! but I beleive that that's the way we're acting during FRIENDSHIP as Lebanese!!

[coralie]

Originally Posted by Kakou

You are still talking about true or bad friends! My point was: IF YOU HAVE A TRUE LEBANESE FRIEND, THIS IS HOW HE ACTS!!... GOT IT !!

Thank you anyway for all of what you've written! It was a pleasure reading your posts and your experiences!! I'm the MOST hurted person by FRIENDS!! but I beleive that that's the way we're acting during FRIENDSHIP as Lebanese!!

well maybe because we fail to see now after being hurt so many times that there is still around us some ppl truthfull and honest ! i mean on devient tres prudent et moins confident c'est tout ! on fini apres tant de mauvaises experiences par devenir mefiant ce qui n'aide pas trop a tisse des relations assez intimes et confidentes avec les autres et tout rest sur un niveau plutot de conivences rien de plus .

[mephisto794]

The words are sweet, and not so far from being true...

as a matter of fact, values of (true) friendship are highly affected by the societal culture.

The value of friendship/family greatly differs between oriental and western societies.

Maybe the expatriates on the forum can give us their feedback , by comparing the two trends of friendship (oriental v/s western) ?